yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
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I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
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I will pee on everything he values.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
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