i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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