How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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