Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Randomize
