I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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