I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
she looked like the before picture.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
Actions speak louder than pants.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
