Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
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