Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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