I wish I only lived at night.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I love having hate sex.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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