So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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