Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize
