I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
