So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
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Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
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We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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