my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
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