Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
