so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
We need to get me chipped asap
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
