Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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