so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were destined to go to rehab together
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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