i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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