check it out our google latitudes are spooning
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Randomize
