They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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