Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
