I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
