It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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