I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
