I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
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