for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
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I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
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He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
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