She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes