just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
