I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
