Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Randomize
