i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
