Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
