Midget sex pt 2 tonight
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
