I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
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