i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
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