Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Randomize
