The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
he just fucked me for my cheese..
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize