Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I'm at about main and main street
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
