btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
