when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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