I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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