Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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