am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
