Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
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