WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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