She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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