Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I believe in your delicious
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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