SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
