WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
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