he wants to bone in the snuggie
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
